thoughts of a fellow cohabitor:

the catholic church's stance on cohabitation is a strong one: don't do it. one of the main reasons for this is because it promotes premarital sex. there are also studies showing that cohabitation before marriage leads to higher divorce rates. in fact, if two catholics who are living together want to get married and tell the priest that they are in fact living together, the priest will (most likely) tell them to separate. if they don't want to separate then they are to have a small private wedding with few guests, so as not to promote this type of behavior in the church.

some couples, however, live together for reasons that seem valid to most people. for example, some people choose to live together for convenience...others live together and actually are chaste people and stay that way. there are many that would argue against this, but you would never really know unless you've experienced it yourself. everyone's situation is different. in my present situtation, it was never thought that we would live together for a long time -- the situation was supposed to be temporary. things change and situations alter sometimes. growing up, i, too believed that living together before marriage was definitely wrong. and though this may sound weird or hypocritical, i still believe it to be wrong, though i am engaging in this act as well. it's kind of one of those things where you know you're doing something wrong but you do it anyways. does that make any sense? that sounds bad...but, david and i have talked about this so many times (which is why i'm not afraid to be publicly stating my views on this matter) and, though our situtation is different and we have our own reasons for why we do the things we do, we both agree with the church's position. this is why when we both make the move up north we will no longer be "cohabitating."

i don't judge those that live together before marriage, not only because i am one of those people, but because everyone has their own reasons and unique situations. and those reasons are between those two people, and need not be justified to the entire world. however, one thing's for sure...if two people choose to live together before marriage, they should both be conscious of and accept responsibility for any consequences that may arise from the situation.

thanks for listening!

http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/ac0603.asp